Dealing with my youngest son (5 years old) has got to be taking years off my life, not to mention causing the increasing amount of grey hairs that are popping up on my head. The past week or so he's been asking for a
Bionicles toy (by Legos). And mine and my husband's response has been "save your money". This of course has not placated him in the least. He does not comprehend yet the whole "saving" concept. The last time he spent his allowance money he bought some regular Legos. But he knew that he had saved up for them and so now when you tell him to save his money, he just responds, "I did!"
Now you have to understand that he has some developmental delays, language delays, and some other diagnoses, plus he's just plain STUBBORN. So whenever Ryan wants something and he doesn't get his way....let's just say all hell breaks loose. Now my husband and I are pretty good parents, we know we can't give in to him just to get him to stop having a tantrum, BUT this kid can throw the biggest, loudest, nastiest tantrums ever. I mean we're talking hysteria. And these tantrums can go on for an hour or more, and even then he's so mad that you can't get him to do anything, nor can you or the family get anything accomplished. So avoiding these kind of situations are at the top of our list because life has to go on and housework and errands and school can't get done if Ryan's having a tantrum. So at times...sometimes against our better judgement...some creative parenting takes place.
Now back to the
Bionicles incident. He wants this toy and doesn't have enough money, so I tell him he can earn some money by cleaning up and doing some chores. He JUMPS at this opportunity and cheerfully starts doing his best at everything I can tell him to do. Of course, a 5 year old cannot really do enough chores to earn $6-8 in one day. And yet, this is exactly what he's thinking...make my bed, pick up my stuffed animals and Legos and- BOOM!- I should have enough for a
Bionicle toy. He also hit a wall in the chore department, he sort of fizzled out and got a little defiant about the last few chores I divvied out to him. But his desire to get this toy TODAY had not changed. So we can see it on the horizon...a tantrum coming based on the inability to understand "saving" money and how much time it can take. And, he's only 5, so we figure we'll cut him a little slack and pay him some $$ for the chores, then and advance him the allowance money he needed- provided he continued to behave and clean up like we told him.
Well, his patience runs dry and he decides he wants the toy ASAP. I put him off until after his speech therapy appointment, hoping he'd forget- HA! yeah right. So after a long discussion in the car I tell him I'll let him get the toy, and that he can open it and look at it, but he can't put it together or play with it until after school, after he's done some more chores. We seemed to be in agreement...so after leaving the therapist's office we head back home toward Target.
Five to 10 minute pass and as we're headed down the road that is on the way to Target (but not the usual route home) he asks, "Mom, where are we going?" I'm thinking "what?! are you serious?!" I say, "we're going to Target." His response: "What're we going to Target for?" At this point (because he knows good and well Target is where he saw the
Bionicle in the first place and is the place where we always go to buy toys/spend allowance $) I don't know what to say. Do I bring up the
Bionicles or just let it go...? So I say, "I need to get some toothpaste"- which was in fact the truth. He then stated that he didn't want to get toothpaste and asked if he could get a hamburger for lunch.
How in the world had the whole ENTIRE morning been about nothing but getting a
Bionicle toy that day, and in turn been forgotten in a span of 10 minutes? I felt like I was talking to Dory (the blue tang) in
Finding Nemo! So off we went to get a hamburger, then home, packed his snack and sent him off to preschool. On his way out the door he talked about cleaning some more when he got home.
I've never met anyone else who could provide me with so much stress and frustration, nor anyone who provides me with so much laughter and joy. He's a child of extremes, but that's one of the things that makes him so lovable.
Other Ryan-isms:
After having a tantrum and locking himself in his room, after a while I felt I should go tell him that lunch was ready if he wanted to eat...when I knocked on the door, his response was: "who goes there?"
He "mooned" us after dinner the other night...where he got this I idea I have no clue.
I bought him some apple juice at a convenience store and after taking the first sip he says, "Hey, this isn't too bad!"
In the midst of my frustration this morning, he looks me directly in the eye and says, "I love you mudder!"
:)
Labels: Bionicles, chores, laughter, parenting, tantrums
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